The Rough Seas Continued...

Now is a difficult time for our family. As we are faced with illness, uncertainty, and troubled times we can only hold close to one another. I am finding it very difficult to put my emotions into words. We are struggling. I know God is ultimately in control. I am struggling with this to be totally honest. This is hard for me to grasp. I know he knew the story of our lives before our lives began, but letting go is hard for me. You see I like to be in control. I know some of you might find this hard to believe (HaHa). I am letting go. I am reaching out and taking God's hand and let him hold me closer than ever before. I need someone to hold me up, as I am holding others up.  I need help. I can not do this alone. None of us can. Lately I have forgotten that I was never alone. He was always there. He was there even though I had forgotten or chose not to see. I am sad that I questioned whether  he was there or not. I wanted someone to be mad at. Someone to blame. Someone to be angry with so the startling news did not hurt so bad. I had forgotten that everything happens for a reason. We do not know the outcome of our current situation. We can only pray, and put our faith and trust in God's great hands. For he only knows.