Why Me?

Potty Training.... I would rather give birth again than continue to do this act that should be so simple. Everyone I talk too only has great stories of triumph to tell. Well, not here! I thought we were headed down the road to success, but boy was I wrong. I tried the all natural way. She just urinated in the vents in her room. I have tried training pants. She just used them like her diaper. I have tried underwear. Let's just say I have cleaned up a lot of urine. I have set timers to remind me to take her every 30 minutes like someone suggested. It worked for them. Not me! So today while out for a day of shopping I was determined to try and encourage the potty just like I have been doing at home. After four trips to the bathroom in 1 hour I will never forget the last one. Well, it was unforgettable for both me and the poor woman in the next stall who obviously was having some gastrointestinal issues. Alexis and I followed a sweet lady into the bathroom and headed into the stall. As I began to undress my angel. What happened next I can't get out of my mind. The woman in the next stall began to pass gas. Well, she continued to pass gas for what I thought was forever. My angel starts to question (in my mind it seemed like she was screaming) "What is that noise?" "What is making that sound?" EWWW Gross!" I tried to talk, sing, and even quiz my daughter to distract her, but I was sooooo unsuccessful! Just when I thought it couldn't get worse, it did. Then the poor soul next to us began to have diarrhea. Alexis picked up on that instantly. She then shouted (well maybe not shouted but that's what it felt like) "What's that smell?" "Ewwww it stinks!" After what felt like an eternity I heard the flush next door, and the closing of the door as the poor woman vacated the premises. It took everything for me not to die hysterically laughing. How do you explain to a three year old proper bathroom etiquette? I was caught off guard. I was unprepared. Next time I will be ready! I will not take her to a public bathroom...EVER! She can wear diapers for the rest of her life! We will never eat at Chili's ever again because we may run into the woman who needs to go to the doctor (Alexis also made that suggestion during our time in the john). I love you Lexi!!